I almost considered not online-diarying about this since it has nothing to do with Hilarious Baby News or Retarded Tigers, but then I realized that this blog is apparently just about Scary Sex Toys now.
Sorry, mom. Your son is a blogger who blogs about sex toys. It’s not your fault though. I blame public schooling and rap music.
Anyways. I don’t know if this counts as a “toy” since toys should be fun and not painful, but I’ll let you be the judge of that. Except for you , mom. You should never, ever read this web-log. Please delete this site from your e-bookmarks. Actually you should probably delete all of the internets from your bookmarks, because they are scary places filled with scary people.
For those of you still reeling from Charlton Heston’s recent decision to evacuate his host-body, this news may send you over the edge: Beloved R&B-magician, Toni Braxton had a heart attack yesterday. Now before you start hysterically sobbing and organizing candle-lit vigils - Get this…She fucking survived.
And do you know why? Because the doctors at St. Rose Dominican Hospital in Las Vegas are fucking pros.
Listen: Let’s get real. No, actually, let’s get unreal:
Listen, girl: I know you don’t really like blogs, but this one is important…Because it’s about you. Or rather it deals with the complex, tortured relationship I’ve developed with you…
